Peace

There is something rejuvenating about being out in nature away from this computer to which I will in all probability be attached to the rest of my life.

No I don't have to look very far or travel a great distance to be out in nature, but, making a conscious decision to leave what I consider my tackle and plow behind, that being the work I do.

My work does not stop on Friday and begin again on Monday. Nor does it end at five on any given day and at this point in my life it is no longer a question of if I want to work, it is a question of when I will work and that gets old.

Desire

Today I had a very strong desire to touch you. I don’t know why, nor what spurned it but out of nowhere there was a physical yearning throughout my body to feel your body next to mine. I wanted to be able to touch and caress you, feel you and taste you. Yeah I know we are being good, but being good isn’t always fun. Being good has its drawbacks too, and I suppose that is one of them, this undeniable desire to touch you.

It seems those desires are at least held at bay a little bit when I know I can call you and talk to you, that helps I suppose, though it is not the same as actually being with you. But, peering into your psyche, your humor, the way you talk, the sound of your voice, do seem to help.

I suppose this is one of my moments of weakness because I know if you were here with me now, I would not be able to not touch you.

Thanksgiving

Things I'm thankful for this Thanksgiving:

NOTE: these are not in any order of preference or importance, simply the order in which they pop into my mind. Except for the one about you.

1. To be alive.

As I think about that one, reflecting back to my childhood and one obsession about having a terminal illness. Smiling now as I think about that, yes, I am glad to be alive.

2. My mother, one of the few people I would willing die for.

I remember asking my mother when I was young how old she was. "36" she said. And I remember think how OLD that seemed at the time. That's been 20 years ago, and she lives in another state. No not a another metaphysical but an actual state. (sorry I'm in a funny mood this morning.)

3. Kids, the other few people I would willing die for.

If I had it to do over again, there are times when I would give them back. My kids are in their teens (oops I just dated myself) but, the thing that keeps me from killing them is flashback to when I held them on my chest and rocking them back and forth because that is the only way the could sleep. Of course I think about all the money I would have, trips to the Bahamas, cars and motorcycles if it weren't for them. All you can do is love them through these years.

4. Wife.

Is that a little too honest, outside the bubble? In this blog that is for me to talk about my thoughts and feelings as they are concerned toward you but, she is a good woman.

6. Dog, I like to think she would willingly die for me. :-)

You can't out love a dog. I have learned from experience that you can kick, choke, and cuss your dog and they still love you. The very worst thing you can do to your dog is ignore her. Seems like there is a lesson in there somewhere. Ya think?

7. Car.

I wouldn't say I love my car, lust maybe because, when I'm in my car doing 100+ MPH radio blaring, it is such a rush.

8. Garlic.

For this I am truly in love/lust with. Cheese is a close second.

9. You.

Because you have inspired me on so many levels. Simply read this blog and you will know that. I am thankful that I know you.

Hmmmm

It is unendingly fascinating to me how we can offer advice to each other in regards to our spouses like how to get along with them and make our relationships better.

Is that weird or maybe a little warped? At the very least, it would be considered odd. I suppose that we look to each other for some degree for validation or acceptance could be considered warped by some, maybe even wrong.

Unbelievably the things you tell me are taken to heart, and they do help, but there in lays what should be the dilemma, that being that I am moving away from you, granted, with your advice but strangely enough, I do not feel that. Would it be strange for me to say it has the opposite effect?

Odd that, an interesting paradigm and I find myself wondering why that is, and I can only come up with three possible explanations.

1. You seem to be offering me advice on how to move away from you and we all know, we want what we cannot have.
2. You genuinely want what is best for me and, that in and of itself makes me care for you more.
3. Maybe we (I) are getting comfortable with our relationship in where it is right now.

Who knows, I know I still think about you every day, and want to call and talk to you all the time or at least chat.

Wild Garlic, Part II

The next day I was able to order the computer parts needed for her father’s computer and decided to work out a time when I could come by and fix the computer in question. We set a time for the following evening where we would meet at her father’s house.

“The only thing is no one will be there, my parents are going out of town. Do you have a problem with that?” she asked.

“Ummm. No I don’t have a problem with that.” I responded. “I will be by about six.”

“Okay.”

The next day was long, I was so looking forward to being alone with her. The time finally came to head to her father’s house. Again it was dark and cold that evening and the house did not look as inviting as it did a couple nights ago as I pulled into the driveway. Only a few lights were on but that did nothing to dampen my spirits.

I walked up to the door and rang the bell. In a moment she met me and let me in. I could not get over how she was able to take my breath away seeing her again.

Again she was in blue jeans, a sweater, and socks. I do not know how she did it for I have seen many a woman dressed similarly but no one sent the electricity she sent though my body when she walked.

“Hi, would you like some wine?” she asked. “You can leave your shoes here.” She continued.

“Why, yes, yes I would.” I responded.

“Let’s put those boxes down here in the office and get some then.” She said.

We walked into the office and I placed the boxes I had brought down. She turned around and lead me into the kitchen and I watched the sway of her ass the entire way. She poured both of us a generous helping of white wine and we headed back toward the office.

As we walked into the office the image of her bent over the desk instantly flashed back into my mind. And I could feel myself plump up instantly.

As I began working on the computer, we talked about work, politics, on which she and I could not find a common ground, and sex.

“Oh, we are out of wine, would you like some more?” She asked.

“Of course.” I said.

I continued working and she returned with the rest of the first bottle and another bottle in tow.

“I think I may love this woman.” was the thought that went through my mind upon seeing the wine and yes it was probably the wine talking at the moment but, I knew I wanted to fuck her and fuck her hard.

It was still early, “we” had only been working about an hour but it was evident that we needed some computer parts and we needed some food. We decided to get some of both.

Things being what they were, we decided to get the computer parts first then acquire some food. The restaurant of choice was Italian which we both love dearly and the restaurant we ended up at was one of her favorite for their garlic rolls.

I ordered a beer and she had some wine to have with the salad and garlic rolls. By now we were both feeling pretty good all of our senses being lustfully filled. With every sip of beer and every bite of the rolls I wanted her even more. My oral fixation was really beginning to kick in and I wanted to taste her mouth, her neck, and her pussy.

The meal was beyond compare. It really was one of those hole in the wall kind of places that few people know about but, I would not be forgetting it ever again.

When we finished we returned to her father’s house to finish our work. She graciously poured each of us another glass of wine and we started to work, installing our newly acquired computer parts and continuing our discussions. I loved her mind. Everything she said to me made me think, and the sarcastic humor I find in myself I found in her.

The computer needed to format the hard drive and it was going to take a little time. We decided to get ourselves another bottle of wine so I followed her down to the entertainment room where the wine was stored. There was also in this room an array of various games one of which was pool. Instantly, visions of her bent over the pool table flashed in my head.

“Do you play pool?” she asked.

“I have a stick.” I said.

I know there are probably one thousand and one sexual puns one could use while playing pool. You got your balls, pool sticks, racking of the balls, putting it in the pocket, sinking it in deep… I decided to leave it at “I have a stick”.

“You have to break because I don’t do that.” She said as she opened the bottle of wine and poured us each another glass.

(to be continued)

Winter

The days have been long and I find myself getting tired, physically tired. I do hope I’m not getting sick. It usually seems this time of year when it gets dark so early I find it difficult to motivate myself and even find myself out of sorts. I am determined not to let that happen this year though I can’t wait for December 21 when the days begin to get longer again. I’m going to keep the running up and have set some goals, I will be running in some runs around here preparing for a ½ marathon.

This week has seemed unusually busy and that my have something to do with my lack of motivation. I have found myself thinking about you and when I can spend some time with you again because you are such a joy for me to be around. I find myself laughing, smiling, and seem to forget all my cares if only for a little while. I find myself wanting you and desiring to take you and ravish you then to lay with you hold you, entangled with you.

And with all the holidays coming up it may be a while and with your resolve some of those things may never happen. But, I still think about them and maybe my promise to honor your wishes may soon be diminished.

Smile

It was good to talk to you today, you are always a nice finish to a busy day. You make me smile.

Dreamer

I am a giver so, let me give.
I am a pleaser, so let me please.
I am a lover, so let me love.
I am a dreamer so, let me dream.

You cannot let me be,
All the things that you need.
Grant me this one request,
Leave my dreams... take the rest.

This was inspired in part by you, and in part by W.B. Yates from his poem "He Wishes for the Clothes of Heaven"

Had I the heaven's embroidered cloths,
Enwrought with golden and silver light,
The blue and the dim and the dark cloths
Of night and light and the half-light,
I would spread the cloths under your feet:
But I, being poor, have only my dreams;
I have spread my dreams under your feet;
Tread lightly because you tread on my dreams.

Dreaming

Tonight I was awakened from my sleep while in the middle of a dream. As those things happen, the dream was fully retained in my memory and if I don't at least get some of it down it will be lost for ever because it was a good dream.

As yo can imagine if I'm writing it here then it is probably about you and it was. Maybe it is a result of the time I was able to spend with you this week I don't know but it was not the normal erotic dream you might be expecting.

As dreams go, it was somewhat discontinuous, the story lines were disconnected as you kept coming in and out of subconsciousness.

We were simply together at one point we were asleep on the bed and you were snuggled up to me. Another, we had gone deep sea fishing (don't ask me why) but we were having a good time out on the ocean in the sun. Finally, I was giving you a piggyback ride your legs around my waist, arms around my neck and your head next to mine.

That's all I remember and I've had my cookies and my milk. I will go back to bed now.

Wild Garlic, Part I

I’ve never thought of myself as a computer geek even though I have been called that from time to time. but, I do like to dabble in working on computers mostly to help friends out and on occasion I’ve been known to help out a friend of a friend.

As it happened on this occasion, I had volunteered to help a friend of friend and seeing how I was going to be in town for a week or so it seemed the appropriate thing to do was to offer my services.

Not being the computer geek that I am, my only requirement was to work for wine which I enjoy dearly, sometimes too much.

The evening was cold, wet and very dark and I was soon wishing I hadn’t offered my services. After driving around a bit, I was able to find the large house in the affluent neighborhood. Pulling into the driveway, the house looked warm and inviting and I was ready to relax a bit even though I was there to work.

I got out of the car and walked up to the door and rang the bell and was greeted by a very attractive young lady wearing blue jeans, a blue sweater and black socks with holes exposing that dark toenail polish.

She really had that college girl thing going on with dark tousled hair, cute eyes and a beautiful smile. I've never been that turned on by young women, I've always found women a little older attractive but something about this one was worked. Also, I don’t know why I’ve always had an affinity for short dark hair and I was instantly turn on by her. The electricity she gave off sent shivers down my spine and gave my member a plump disposition.

With a quick hug, she said hello and asked me to come in. We strolled into the living room where I was given the requisite wine, as payment for the services I would to be rendering that evening.

I was introduced to everyone in her family for this was a night that her family got together and it was her father’s computer that was suppose to be the object of my attention that evening, but I couldn’t keep my eyes off her and she knew it because I didn’t do a very good job of concealing my attraction to her.

After dinner and another glass of wine, it was time to take a look at the computer in question. I followed her and her father into his office.

Her blue jeans fit her perfectly, and her as was a joy to watch, not just her ass but the way she walked her whole body moved in a sexy orchestra of sensuality.

They say guys have sexual thoughts like every 10 seconds or minute or something. I forget what the statistic is but with two glasses of wine in me and watching this orchestra in motion all of my senses were beginning to overload.

At that moment all I could think about is having my body pressed against her from behind, so she could fee how she excites me and gently kissing her neck, tasting her skin, and smelling her hair.

We made it to the office and I began looking at the computer. From time to time she would lean over the desk pulling the blue jeans tight and standing on her tip-toes to see what was going on. I was full hard on now but she couldn’t see. All I could think about was taking her from behind, fucking her hard, caressing her tits and back while I fucked her. I just wanted to touch every inch of her.

Yep, there was a problem with the computer and that couldn’t be fixed that night. Actually, there were two problems that couldn’t be fixed that night and now one of them was mine, I was beginning to obsess over this lust I had for this woman. I needed to get out of there before all the wine I had drunk that evening kicked all the way in.

“Well, you do have a problem with your computer.” I said. “It will require that I order some parts and come back another time to install them.”

“That will be fine.” Her father said. “Just work it out with my daughter.”

“That sounds good, I’m sure I can get what we need and make it back later in the week.” I said.

I gathered up my things and headed toward the door. She was close behind. I turned to her and gave her a hug and told her I would call her tomorrow. She smiled and gave a quick wink. I wasn’t sure if it was a nervous tick from drinking, or if she was trying to tell me something.

Being the optimist that I am, I decided to hope for the best.

As for the moment I couldn’t get back to my hotel room, because I knew who I would be thinking of tonight when I took care of my needs.

(to be continued)